Pain is an irrefutable part of living a fully realized life. Very few people are in favor of being truly alive so there's no help from most of them. In fact, they think it's kind to keep you in an unrealized state of being. You can't control much I don't think. Except your choices. But not the results. You can choose not to hurt yourself. It doesn't mean you're safe, but it's what you can do.
I cry all the time when I listen to music particularly Radiohead stuff because it's so beautiful it hurts. This is an old philosopher's saying, I am probably paraphrasing but I think the philosopher is Nietzsche: "Beauty is the beginning of terror." We fear its loss the second we find it. And fear is a kind of pain.
Cut yourself some slack. Control is an illusion. Beauty is everywhere. It comes in funky takes a while to get into the groove stuff too. And while it can hurt, it's the only antidote to all the other pain we have. Yeah, life is full of ironies.
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