Dig deep aviunnnnnn

[kagE]

A child tugging at his fathers coatA vast expanse a useless emptyMoatThe random order of thingsIf its not luckIt was just meant to beOur judgements based on our ownPhilosophyThe paranoia is wrestling his twinAnd my outlook looks well dimAnother hospital stay another slowRecoveryWondering what's real or fakeAll the mistakes I makeAll the clues a gatheredThen lostFeeding my manic delusionsCrossing the street cause the windChanged directionLiving a life consumed by numbersAnd a secret codeSo sure of myselfSo soon to be out of controlThinking I finally got it allFigured outSo soon to be shouted to the worldBut I've learned it's really aPersonal thingOne that won't make sense to everyoneElseStill it drives me to right and thatCan't be wrongTrying to get to the downside ofManicTrying to kill the urge to runAwayTrying to learn from the pastAnd not take everything as aSignalBut the ole brain She's got someCrossed circuitryAnd you gotta do what you mustTo try and enjoy what little I canA frequent flyer on the ambulanceI think I'm just looking for someRecognitionWhich might make if I ever didAnythingExcept live in my mind and theGames I choose to playCause it kills the void and sufferingTo much you sayMy hands are just warming upI thrive with my cup and crushed iceSometimes pretending nothingIs wrongDumb it down.crush its controlWhile being sucked into the tv screenIf it wasn't for my other halfMy life would have no meaningThoughts of rejection teach me aLesson not to get involvedConvinced myself I will just get hurtA crushing blow to the federalistsAnd their cronies is how I would like itTo playDown with the whole god damnedMonopolyNature knows best and its screamingAt me to go for us to be set freeTake out the leader and the rest willFall in lineThose fucking parasitesPutting restrictions on how I chooseTo live my lifeAs long as I'm not hurting anyoneJust the ones that put the leashesAround our necksTrying to control my animal that livesInsideAnd breathes to be freeIs any of this sounding familiar?Are there any kindred spirits?You pack I will roll so we can get thatSaturated highAnd take it at a most spiritual wayKnowing its better than the alternativesThat are available hoping to turn myWords into nailsAs if they would do a structure goodHolding up on principleCaring in all honesty because that wasA givin tripFuck the narcos and the black in bluesPlaying by their own rulesNot satisfied they look to tack anotherCharge onHoping you'll end up with a life sentenceI'm calling farceWe have rules to be followedBut what would happen if freedomWas the law of the landThat and not killing for no reasonWould they still call it treasonIf it led us to something better?Would we still make shitty filmsJust because entertainmentWas in demandOr should there be a law for that to?No shitty movies seems fairHere I am screaming about psychotic shitIn my underwearI once thought I had a pointHad a purposeBut it's just those such delusions thatCause me so much griefYou shouldn't say this to your familyLet alone a combustible strangerI see you now I will raise the stakes laterAll in an effort to push the envelopeAnd not pull upUntil I can make out and distinguishEach blade of grassAs I go screaming passedRestrained and on a guerneyPumping the Thorazine downI'm outta control but I like it betterThan my passive stanceLets see if we could put to the practicalSome of this crazy shitMight hurt could do betterJumping from the elevator shaftI'm weary of strangers thinkingThey can pull one overBut in this state I won't let it happenI'm more preemptive in this heightened stateIt could come off rather scaryI'm held together but just by myInsecuritiesFree of disease and will to mingleSee if you can get my toes to curlYou'll know you got something going rightTrip girl ride me out of sight