Love (51)
It has been an anthem for me these days, and I hummed it to myself yesterday (along with Patti Smith's "People Have the Power") in Washington DC as I marched for love and hope with my sisters and brothers.
And of course, thank you for everything you have done to nourish our souls and and rescue our faith in beauty and truth for all these years.
With much love for all of you and your families and friends,
Carin
thank you
When you see back time you can see what was in your mind.
How naive we were.
Now that time has pass, we see what we had was a lot.
i regret yes i do.
if i could change something i would..
but.. can't
so... i will see you in the next life.
moving or in stillness
right action can flow
hear it traverse along the songlines
our hearts sang to us
even before we were born
what the eyeballs did while waiting in line at the Roundhouse, July
For her, you are the light at the end of the tunnel, the halo of glowing yellow that she has been waiting for. Never forget that you are someone worth steering for, someone worth the swift kick in the opposite direction, worth all of the trials and checklists and almostrights because you are a mountaintop, the crush of violet on skin from a rainbow that seems so close to the earth that it must be real. When she comes to you, gorge on her compassion. Fill yourself completely. She thinks you a miracle, a revelation and will count herself as the lucky one. Do not question her or yourself — this is exactly the kind of love you deserve.
(quote from Cody Gohl, with gender shift)
it ain't no use to sit and wonder why
it don't matter, anyhow
and it ain't no use to sit and wonder why
if you don't know by now
when your rooster crows at the breaks of dawn
look out your window and I'll be gone
you're the reason I'm traveling on
if i’m not there now physically
i’m always before you
come what may
it ain't no use in turning on your light
that light I never knowed
and it ain't no use in turning on your light
i'm on the dark side of the road
but I wish there was somethin' you would do or say
to try and make me change my mind and stay
just give me more time I hope and pray
i mistake all you say
the seeds of the dandelion you blow away
it ain't no use in calling out my name
like you never done before
it ain't no use in calling out my name
i can't hear you any more
i'm a-thinking and a-wond'rin' walking down the road
i once loved a woman, a child I'm told
i give her my heart but she wanted my soul
you got me into this mess so
you get me out
so long honey
where I'm bound, I can't tell
goodbye's too good a word
so I'll just say fare thee well
i ain't saying you treated me unkind
you could have done better but I don't mind
who else do you kiss
with those lips, with those lips
gone with a touch of your hand
If i knew now
what i knew then
these are the rules, these are the rules
and they are cruel
the message is the message
.end transmission.
keeee-RAP.
Here comes the sickler with her brand new polaroids...
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would be nice again.
[oh?]
trust me.
{oh.}
who knows. maybe i'll see you again someday. stranger things have happened after all.
it's a small city
we'll see.
or not
we'll see. one way or the other.
what's there to see exactly?
there's this movie that i like. that i watched again the other night.
these two characters have a very brief affair. and it comes to an abrupt and odd end.
one of them says to the other as it's ending: "what's wrong with you?"
and the other replies: "let me think about that. i'll tell you the next time i see you."
to which: "sure. tell me then."
on my first 1 or 2 viewings, i always thought the one *believed* they would see the other again, and that they would say just what was wrong with them. but this last time, on friday, i recognized that they only said it because they knew they would never see the other again.
what's there to see, K----? I don't know. and that's ok.
ah, what a hemingway-esque dialogue. yes, it's okay.
___________
...I remember the day that I walked away from this empty flight...
it was a month ago today.
I do think i know what's happening.
and i am fighting.
but.
it's probably slipping through my fingers.
walls have gone up.
until rings are off.
feelings locked.
key to be found.
but can it.
doubt.
fear.
sadness.
yet.
hope remains.
a glimmer.
it has to.
or.
10 pounds lost.
mind dizzied.
a stomach gutted.
a soul stirred.
a heart wrenched.
like a landfill.
a blur of images.
love lost.
love blossomst.
love lost again.
only one way to find out.
only one.
tremors now.
funny how i've never seen hers.
but now i have them.
i miss i want your lips.
i miss every stupid thing.
i miss i'm still talking to you.
this is fuckd up.
fuckd up.
but let me take control.
you can offer me escape.
is it too much.
we'll see.
we.
will.
see.
next stop:
even stranger.
