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Moving on

It feels good trying to rid myself of all the baggage and thoughts and overall negativity I don't need. I'm nowhere near being 100 percent done with all of it, but slowly and surely, I'm getting there. More than likely I will fail, and more than likely you will see this blog in some way shape or form again, but at least I'm being honest.And with that said, I'm becoming less afraid to write in this. Sometimes honesty is better than anything else when it comes to blogging in these things and sometimes insecurity, jealousy, and vain-ness, had taken its place over honesty in the past. I know I've said this before, but I'm not perfect, and I'm still trying.Recently, I've had to rethink pretty much my entire life--okay okay maybe it's not that dramatic---but a huge part of myself, nonetheless. I didn't think things would ever come to this, but it did. Minor obstacles that were similar to this always came along, but we always got through it. Which was how it should be because blood is thicker than water. However, I need to take ACTION and know that when people cause me more sadness and hurt than they do happiness, I can't allow them to be around me. I can't do that to myself. I get sad. I become bitter. Then, that turns to anger, and things are said, things are regretted..etc. I just can't do that to myself anymore. So, whoever it is, no matter the relationship, I'm letting go.At least, I'm trying my hardest, and so far things are going well.
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Лекарства

Томодиум. Йоркомицин.Ото всех болезней. Кроме йоркомании и томоголизма.Вызывают привыкание.Перед приемом ни с кем советоваться не надо.
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ok computer_in rainbows

Ten years after OK Computer shocked the world, Radiohead released In Rainbows on October 10 (10/10). Though no one was expecting the album to be released until 2008, Radiohead announced In Rainbows just ten days in advance. In Rainbows, which consists of ten letters, has ten tracks, and would be downloadable from a rumored ten servers.Radiohead preceded the release of In Rainbows with nine cryptic messages. They repeatedly emphasized X, the Roman Numeral for ten, in phrases such as “March Wa X”, and “Xendless Xurbia”. The tenth message was posted on October 10 with a photo of the band drinking tea.There has been a lot of speculation over Radiohead’s emphasis of ten surrounding the release of In Rainbows. One theory suggests that Radiohead was typifying a binary code of ones and zeros, 1010101010. This has come to be known as the Binary Theory, also called the TENspiracy by some.Puddlegum first addressed the Binary Theory in Radiohead: 1010101010. Someone associated with Thom Yorke contacted Puddlegum, sharing Thom’s reaction to Puddlegum’s article:“The meaning behind all of this is right in front of our faces, we’re just overlooking it. [Thom] has been expecting an article much like this one for a couple of years, as have I. But I’m willing to wager he’ll have fun waiting a few more. On the other hand, it seems to annoy him that no one ‘gets it’ yet, given the mountain of clues.”Ten days after our original article, we have come to believe that OK Computer and In Rainbows were meant to complement each other. During the writing and recording process of OK Computer, Radiohead used the working title of Zeros and Ones. If OK Computer is represented by 01, and In Rainbows is represented by 10, then we have 01 and 10. In binary code 01 and 10 complement each other.Consider that In Rainbows was meant to complement OK Computer, musically, lyrically, and in structure. We found that the two albums can be knit together beautifully. By combining the tracks to form one playlist, 01 and 10, we have a remarkable listening experience. The transitions between the songs are astounding, and it appears that this was done purposefully.The lyrics also seem to complement each other. There appears to be a concept flowing through the 01 and 10 playlist. Ideas in one song is picked up by the next, such as “Pull me out of the aircrash,” and “When I’m at the pearly gates, this will be my videotape.”To create the 01 and 10 playlist, begin with OK Computer’s track one, Airbag, and follow this with In Rainbow’s track one, 15 Step. Alternate the albums, track by track, until you reach Karma Police on OK Computer, making All I Need the tenth track on the 01 and 10 playlist. Follow Karma Police with Fitter Happier from OK Computer, for tracks eleven and twelve. These two tracks act as a bridge between the first ten and the following ten tracks on the 01 and 10 playlist. Then continue to alternate the albums again, picking up with Faust Arp on In Rainbows, with Electioneering on OK Computer as the following track.Radiohead - 01 and 10 playlist:1. Airbag (OK Computer)2. 15 Step (In Rainbows)3. Paranoid Android (OK Computer)4. Bodysnatchers (In Rainbows)5. Subterranean Homesick Alien (OK Computer)6. Nude (In Rainbows)7. Exit Music (For A Film) (OK Computer)8. Weird Fishes/Arpeggi (In Rainbows)9. Let Down (OK Computer)10. All I Need (In Rainbows)11. Karma Police (OK Computer)12. Fitter Happier (OK Computer)13. Faust Arp (In Rainbows)14. Electioneering (OK Computer)15. Reckoner (In Rainbows)16. Climbing Up The Walls (OK Computer)17. House Of Cards (In Rainbows)18. No Surprises (OK Computer)19. Jigsaw Falling Into Place (In Rainbows)20. Lucky (OK Computer)21. Videotape (In Rainbows)22. The Tourist (OK Computer)the album title can be heard in the backing vocals of Reckoner.BUT, did anyone notice theIN RAAAAAAAININ RAAAAAAAININ RAAAAAAAINNNNN IN RAAAAAAAININ RAAAAAAAINBOWSstarts precisely at the albums golden section??? I've got fucking chills; can anyone concur?The Golden Section, Golden Ratio, appears at 1/1.618, or about 61.8% of a way through of a work of art. Seehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_ratioIn Rainbows is 42m 34s, or 2554 seconds long. 2554/1.618 is the 1578th or so second of the album, which is 2m49s into Reckoner, precisely when the strings come in with the album title.I can't believe that is coincidental...can anyone confirm?I found this on line i think this is very insteresting.
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dear lil nessa

Dear Eighteen Year Old Self:This is yourself at twenty eight, pay attention because I know more than you do.Don’t obsess about your body, enjoy the size 2 or 6 that you are now because as you get older it will be harder to stay like that. Don’t take diet pills, they really don’t do much and will forever screw up your metabolism so you won’t be able to lose weight. I know this sucks, you want a simple solution but I can tell you that 10 years later that hasn’t changed. Learn to be healthy now.I know you think your boyfriend is the love of your life and you will think this for a few years but he’s not, the love of your life will come in time, just be patient. You will date a lot of guys that are wrong from you but it’s ok, it’s a learning experience. Your heart will break many times but don’t lose faithYou are a sensitive girl and will always be sensitive but that’s ok, it’s not a bad thing. If you have to cry just cry, if you need to be alone it’s ok. Make sure to take care of yourself first because you should be number one in your life, everything else will work itself out. Don’t let it overwhelm you, you have an amazing life ahead of you with so many truly happy moments.Right now you have no idea who you are or what you want to do with your life, this won’t change but you’ll come to terms with it. Nobody really knows themselves or not completely at least, it’s a day to day thing.The future is worth it, I promise. Don’t test your life, just enjoy everyday for what it is. Some days are harder than others but there is always a good one somewhere around the corner. Your life is worth a lot and there are a lot of people you will meet that will be glad you stuck around.Oh and one more thing…when they say not to mix beer and liquor they mean it…there is nothing fun about the result.Love,You In ten Years
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meeting

Into this blue twilight skyI lay by your sideand this feels likea milion years agoand everything makes sense...I get lost in the blue.I get lost in your gaze.And in this very minuteI experience the eternitycoming from your eyes,expanding its flashnessthroughout the space from my bonesI know now what I always searched:this syncronized pulsation,the organic beats and the lucidityof being part of your lifeand you being mine.
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fuck off

it's useless being a turnip and im never trying again.i am a poor sport and the very worst turnip. all you other stupid silly little vegetables can ponce off and fuck yourselves, im not going to pay attention to you.
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machine

vito & howardrunning down the rabbit holechasing the bedtime fantasyinfatuated with the idea of completioneither one being the other halfis this a realization of self?a deceitful defeat?probably more than possibly.possibly alone forever.
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30 on the rocks.

i'm split between two dead endsmeasuring the distance of both to see which will outweigh the other in timei know the fate of each ending. i know there is no way out.months ago, after travels and seclusion, my only focus was to drive forwarddriving has been taken away as a privilege, which lead to the drive itself vanishingthis should sum it up

warehouse party

or subtract it all together.
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Y ours

Distant crickets and wooden wicketsHear your voiceSing through windowsUntil dusk will settleLet change be your choice .C
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goals ..life ..lessons.

It is said that each of us, from the wealthiest statesman to the lowliest disadvantaged pauper, enters this little thing called Life with a few goals. A list, if you will. The list is imprinted upon our soul at birth just as the DNA carried in our cells is emblazoned with genetic blueprints. Some blueprints unilaterally dictate certain aspects of our life, creating unstoppable roadblocks and force us in a specific direction, and the lesson presents itself with how we handle those situations. Other blueprints simply expose themselves as suggestions or tendencies that provide us a choice, and in a similar way, the learning comes from making a choice.Have you ever heard that you have a special purpose in this life? Every person plays a role? God has a plan for you? Everything happens for a reason? There are no coincidences? All this has happened before and will happen again? You cannot escape your destiny? You are my density? I mean, my destiny?Well, here’s the deal. You have this list you carry around with you that represents what you’re supposed to learn during your time here on Earth. And the truth is - you will learn it, or you’ll die, not trying. Literally.At first, you’ll notice these coincidences in your life. ”Opportunities,” we’ll call them. The more you turn away from them, the stronger they’ll become. Resistance is only met with a more stubborn world you live in. The thing is - until you face the issue and learn your lesson, the lesson will get more and more painful to learn

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Merce Cunningham 1919 - 2009

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Thom, Merce e Jónsi"We are very sad to hear about Merce Cunningham’s death yesterday, aged ninety.Merce invited us to take part in his Split Sides project, in October 2003. It was a collaboration of music and dance, but one where each of the elements - set, costume,choreography and music - were randomly combined, to create a performance around chance. He was very kind and hospitable, and invited us around to his apartment the night before the show. He showed us his computer program which generated random sequences of gesture and movement for wire-framed mannequins, like Kraftwerk’s Robots. He also showed us, the next night, that discipline and focus can create the space for an unexpected moment, when something new can suddenly exist: such a contrast to the scripted world of rock. "http://www.radiohead.com/deadairspace/index.php?c=494
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Bicycling - not always good for your health

I had an accident on my way to work tonight. A car tried to pass me although there was obviously not enough space. Got brushed by its side mirror, managed to stop without tumbling over and ended up with nothing worse than a nasty cut on my shin, probably from my chain, I'm not sure.
Lucky.
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A note

Wondrous words of wisdomYou speak through tears butLaugh through fearsTaken aback by memoriesLove will keep you herec
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just putting words together

I have not written. You know like really written. From deep down, the depths of my heart, written. I have maybe scratched the surface of the concept of writing, but I have not written.More like I have written for show only. Just to say I wrote something.But I have not told you what is truly suffocating me.Come to think of it, I don’t think I can tell you or anyone for that matter, what is really suffocating me. Because I personally don’t know.I can tell you that I am feeling lonely.I am feeling neglected, and sometimes forgotten.I can also tell you that I don’t like feeling of any of the above.But for now I am just going through the motions of life just to say that I have done them.I have submerged myself into this cozy suffocation. At times I fight for air and there are also time where I just don’t even care.Don’t read too much into my words. They don’t necessarily mean much. They are like storm clouds ready to roar and scream, but deliver very little rain.I just want to voice what I feel.Just because I feel it, it does not necessarily mean that I have a plan. I am just using my writings as an outlet. A method of venting until I see a viable plan. For now, there are none. If you know what I mean.
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when I was a lil' girl

I don’t have that many early childhood memories. But I do remember one little thing. I had this cute little pink sailor dress with an anchor that was embroidered on the chest. It had puffy sleeves. And ruffles on the skirt.As a kid I was clumsy, not much is different from being two to twenty eight. I still run into walls and fall out of my chair. But that’s not my point.I remember this incident clearly because my dad had disappeared and after long awaited return he finally decided to resurface. I remember wearing that dress. I ran to him, tripped on my own two feet and fell nose first on the asphalt. I scraped my knees, and my elbow. Like the great father he is, he picked me up and handed me to my grandma.I remember her washing my wounds and soothing me with her voice. Regardless what she said the tears rolled down my face like a storm cloud had erupted. Later, much later, I learned that when I fall down, I just get up, dust myself off, and move on.Just like my clumsiness, not much else is different. I fall down, I get right back up, dust myself off, and keep moving. Forward. It is always forward. Rarely do I look back. If I do, the sight of the rock that tripped me will well up emotions in me and be a cause for tears. Not now, I don’t have time for tears. Later….much later….I will have plenty of time to cry. But for now, I keep moving forward. It is never backwards, but always forwards.And forward it is that I go. I have rested long enough. Time to keep moving. I have no time to waste and no tears to spare. If I have to burn the evidence of ever being there, then so be it. I can do it. That’s what enormous campfires are for.
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another bummer for the summer, i need a moment!

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/32085116?GT1=43001Adios, Chihuahua! Taco Bell dog dead at 15Gidget, known for the tagline ‘Yo quiero Taco Bell,’ died from a strokeAPTaco Bell advertisement mascot Gidget died on Tuesday night after suffering a stroke.View related photosLatest News from PEOPLEPets.comKendra's Beach DatePetiquette: What to Do When Your Pal's Pad Reeks of His Pooch?EXCLUSIVE: Taco Bell Spokesdog Gidget Dies at 15Study: Babies Can Best Understand Barking DogsSpotted: Shaq Plus Panda Equals 1 Giant Meeting!SlideshowAnimal TracksFrom a beautiful butterfly to a confused capuchin, find images of animals great and small.more photosVideo: Pets & animalsWeb only: If Meredith's dog could talk ...July 21: The TODAY family weighs in on what Meredith's dog, Jasper, would say if he could talk.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Keeping your pet cool in summerChihuahua impaled by BBQ forkSquirrel in a sticky situationEncounters with wildlife.updated 11:07 a.m. CT, Wed., July 22, 2009She charmed millions without ever saying a word — and managed to make fast-food tacos adorable. Gidget, the Chihuahua best known for her Taco Bell ad campaign (and her famous overdubbed tagline, "Yo quiero Taco Bell"), died from a stroke on Tuesday night at age 15."She made so many people happy," says Gidget's trainer, Sue Chipperton. PEOPLE met both Gidget and Sue at a Hollywood animals photo shoot in February, where the pup was a consummate pro and delighted the crew with her playful nature."When she's on a set, she comes alive," Chipperton said at the time. But when the mostly retired canine actor wasn't joining her trainer on shoots, the 15-year-old was happy to just kick back. "She goes on hikes with me and she loves the sun," said Chipperton, who added that Gidget was happy to sleep "for 23 hours and 45 minutes a day. She'll lay outside when it's 105 degrees! I like to joke that it's like looking after a plant."Story continues below ↓--------------------------------------------------------------------------------advertisement | your ad here--------------------------------------------------------------------------------In addition to her gig as spokesdog for Taco
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try this in your car

The magnetosphere of Jupiter is one of the biggest entities in the solar system, IF YOU DRIVE DOWN A DARK DESERT ROAD AT NIGHT , tuning in and out of stations YOU CAN HEAR SIGNALS ///SOUNDS,, like crashing waves and lowered and heightened pitches, RADIO ADMISSIONS THAT ARE ACTUALLY ADJUSTED TO YOUR RADIO FROM JUPITER'S OUTER MAGNETOSPHERE
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Tho you´ll never read this Thom, it´s like public confession or something for me...i admire your great character...you´re so fucking special :D i don´t know you, you´re right, but i´d realy like to...i can´t explain the feelings i have about you, but they´re here and i can´t stop them. it´s like here was you and there the rest of the world, see?...my friends laugh at me because you´re something like god for me:D (i´m not believer:D)...i know, it´s ridiculous but, that´s the way i feel...it´s maybe because of Radiohead´s music, because your music realy got me! i love radiohead....i love the way you sing and dance live, you´re like crazy guy during the song (idioteque, myxomatosis-my favourite live, gloaming) but when it ends, you´re a nice guy again...you give to your show everything and that´s brilliant...you´re like out of your mind, sometimes you´re even scary..but the more you´re crazy the more i love it:D Am i insane? not more then you are:)) 23.8. it´s a gig in Prague, i´ll be there....i live in Prague, beautiful city - you will like it...i´m looking forward to see and hear you guys...i was at the berlin gig last summer and it was amazing..so like i said you´d never read this tho, i don´t care. btw you should do something with your hair (like cut!!) man! you look like some homeless guy, sorry...but i love your clothes....especially your shirts
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